Sexy & Secure

The 12-Week Love & Desire Group Coaching Lab for Gay Men

For high-achieving gay men ready to create lasting secure connection, (re)ignite desire, and build relationships that turn them on—emotionally and erotically, whether it’s been 10 months or 10 years. (For singles and those in relationships alike!)

Welcome to Sexy and Secure!

The 12-week online group coaching experience designed specifically for gay men who are ready to...

✔ Build secure attachment
✔ Learn the science of desire
✔ Create aligned relationships with depth, authenticity, and pleasure
✔ Lead in love with clarity—and no more fear, games, or self-abandonment
✔ Evolve their self-leadership in love and in the bedroom

you have never been one to settle in life,

so why settle in love?

Maybe you’re:

  • Always chasing the unavailable guy (or losing interest in the ones who stay)

  • In a relationship that looks great—but lacks spark or intimacy

  • Wondering if you’re too much... or not enough

  • Craving sex that feels hot and emotionally connected

  • Feeling like secure, long-term, turned-on love might just not be for you

Let’s get one thing clear:

There is nothing wrong with you. You aren’t broken and don’t need fixing.


You were just never taught how to create secure and passionate relationships as a gay man! You’ve had to learn how to build safety, desire, and connection from scratch. And now, you’re ready to do it on purpose with the tools you never knew you needed to thrive in love and the bedroom.

  • Testimonials

    "Amazing group experience. Craig is insightful and the group was a safe, nurturing but also challenging environment. Craig and the group helped me realize what it was I wanted and how I could begin to get it. Issues such as relationships, internalized biases, anxiety and vulnerability were explored thoroughly and the support has continued even after the group ended. So often queer men feel isolated, alone and lost in some way or another; this group is a way to come together and work through those things. Truly life changing experience." ~ Bryce

  • Testimonials

    “Working with Craig and the Queer men’s group coaching was a revelatory experience. Craig creates a very safe space from the get-go and holds space for the group to adjust and adapt to each other in order for the richness of the experience to take flight. This is not therapy, this is elevating and stepping further into your truth and power as a gay man. I loved that it was not so much about digging up the past as much as it was about stepping into your future self. It was the least intimidating boot camp-like 4-month program. It is challenging, enlightening, cathartic, and at times, very rewarding.” ~ David

  • Testimonials

    “In my opinion, it was truly one of the smartest financial investments I have made by myself/for myself, and I cannot wait to see the continued growth pay off in dividends. Craig is incredibly insightful; he is a true leader and helper. His skill set and thoughtfulness are what make the group so successful. The reassurance that he is always on your side rooting for you is quite comforting. The idea of group coaching/life coaching was foreign to me. After having been in therapy for much of my life; I found this to be a beautiful way to integrate what I already knew about myself while being equipped with the skills and tools to apply it to my life.

    As gay men, we need more pathways that embrace community and what Craig is doing allows for that to happen in such a beautiful and organic way.” ~ David

The Sexy & Secure Transformation

You won’t just learn about secure love.
You’ll become the man who creates it—with ease, clarity, and erotic confidence.

This program is for you if you ’are currently…

  • Stuck in cycles of hot-cold dating, ghosting, or emotional unavailability

  • In a relationship but craving more depth, honesty, or desire

  • Feeling like love is either safe or sexy—but not both

  • Performing in sex instead of actually enjoying it

  • Carrying shame from your past, or fear that you’re too much / not enough

After 12 sessions you Will walk away:

  • Grounded in your worth, no longer chasing crumbs or settling for misaligned partners or “almosts”

  • With a deep understanding of your attachment style—and how to shift you and your partner towards security

  • In a relationship (or ready for one) that reflects your full truth—emotionally and sexually

  • Clear on how to create a partnership that actually turns you on

  • Confident AF in love and in life—because you know who you are and what you’re building!

The Logistics

Sexy & Secure zoom calls will begin on April 9th, 7:30-9:00pm EST and will occur 3x a month for 4 months through July. (Time and Date subject to change based on participant availability)

What’s included:

12x90 minute group coaching calls

Attachment Style & Desire Archetype Assessment

My personal Love Crafting method for building rebuilding secure and satisfying relationships you can share with your partner(s)

1x60 minute 1:1 call for additional personalized coaching and support.

Apply to join

Life’s too short for bad sex, blue balls, and relationships that cause more stress than they do pleasure. It’s time you learned how to create the relationship of your (wet) dreams and I’m here to help.

Fill out the following form and I’ll be in touch to schedule a complimentary intake call to go over more of the details and answer any questions you have about the Sexy and Secure group coaching lab!

Meet Your Coach

Craig Cassey, MA

I’m a queer executive life, relationship, and sex coach with a background in positive psychology who brings a trauma-informed and pleasure-centric approach to personal development.

For the last 6 years I’ve worked with high-achieving queer men from entrepreneurs, to doctors and creatives, who’ve built success in their professional lives but still struggle with intimacy, desire, or feeling fully expressed in love. I’ve seen that success in the world doesn’t always translate to success in relationships—and that most of us were never taught how to create love that feels secure, erotic, and true to who we really are.

That’s why I created Sexy & Secure—a 12-week group coaching lab for gay men ready to stop settling and start leading in love. This isn’t just about finding the right partner. It’s about becoming the kind of man who can hold emotional depth, initiate honest desire, and experience connection that’s hot and grounded. My approach combines evidence-based tools, embodied practice, and bold self-leadership to help you shift patterns, activate pleasure, and build the kind of relationship you’ve always wanted—but never fully believed was possible.

🧠 What You’ll Learn + Embody

Each week is designed to help you shift from confused, anxious, or avoidant… to grounded, confident, and embodied in your own erotic and relational leadership.

Weeks 1–3: Uncovering Your Relational Programming & Self-sabotage

  • Unpack your relationship patterns + attachment style

  • Rewire old stories about love, sex, and worth

  • Get clear on what you truly desire (vs what you’ve been settling for)

Weeks 4–6: Relating Like a Secure Man

  • Learn to nourish your own security & communicate with confidence even when triggered

  • Explore secure boundaries + relationship agreements in bed and beyond that set you up for success

  • Learn to build connection without losing your erotic spark or sense of self

Weeks 7–9: Erotic Confidence + Pleasure

  • Uncover your internal desire type and how to use it for better sex

  • Heal sexual shame + become a confident, connected lover

  • Discover your erotic blueprint to sustain desire in long term relationships even during periods of stress

Weeks 10–12: Integration + Audacious Self-Leadership

  • Learn to “Love Craft” your relationship with (future) partners to be mutually satisfying, passionate, and supportive.

  • Step fully into your power as an erotic and relational leader & manage conflict constructively

  • Celebrate how far you’ve come—and boldly claim what’s next with clarity, confidence, and embodied direction